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Name: Rose Dixon Email: Date: Sunday January 01, 2006 14:26:47 GMT Comments: I am a birth mother. My son was born in 1965 and I loved and cared for him for 4 weeks. He was taken from me when he was 4 weeks old by the catholic church and placed with a couple for adption. I had no say in this matter and was devastated. 39 years later my son found me via the internet and we have had the most wonderful reunion. We are both amazed at the intensity of love that we feel for one another. I am now 40 years later trying to come to terms with the pain inflicted on my by so called 'good' people. |
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Name: Cindy Wells/Truckle Email: Date: Wednesday December 07, 2005 04:45:37 GMT Comments: Im a Natural mom to John Cory
Truckle from Toronto Ontario ...I have been searching since 1995 and have
gotten Nowhere fast..My son was born October 21 1985 and Taken (Not
Relinguished) in 1986 at 17 months old..After going to court to fight the
c.a.s. to get my son back, the worker told me he'd be a crown ward til hes 18
and I could get him back at that time...Hes now 20...I dont know how to
search Archives and stuff so its hard finding what you dont know...I cant
wait til the 18 months is done with and I can move on to find my son that Ive
wanted to hold all his life and wasnt considered worthy enough to do so... |
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Name: Christine Email: Date: Tuesday December 06, 2005 11:10:19 GMT Comments: I am a 32 year old birth mother
who, just days ago, was reunited with my 13 year old daughter. Her life seems
to be mimicing mine at her age. It is through her amazing adoptive parents
that this reunion was possible. This is all so new and there are many
unanswered questions (for all of us) I am hoping some one reunited with a
minor child will read this and email me. I have scoured the internet and have
found nothing regarding this very unique reunion. |
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Name: Tammy Email: Date: Tuesday December 06, 2005 04:16:26 GMT Comments: I did not know that what i have felyt for 19 years was so common.They said I would be fine with time, but I wasn't. I never will be, but at least I am not crazy for feeling this even now. Thank you for telling me it is okay to still hurt this much. I am not able to just forget my son. |
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Name: elizabeth gellatly Email: Date: Saturday November 26, 2005 17:50:06 GMT Comments: I am a birthmother from that time- 1968 was the year for me- and it is very validating to see pieces of my own experience in print. I have written many pages trying to articulate that experience for myself and others. thank you! |
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Name: Sayu Email: Date: Friday November 25, 2005 18:01:59 GMT Comments: Sorry :( |
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Name: loretta ramsey Email: Date: Saturday November 12, 2005 13:22:19 GMT Comments: I have read the guess book and wish everyone best luck in finding there child.god bless!!! im also a bmother looking for a babygirl,erha ann ramsey name at birth.born9-16-86 |
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Name: FRANCYNE Email: Date: Sunday November 06, 2005 19:59:14 GMT Comments: Iam BM looking for my son born 10/29/1969 in Onieda NY and adoption was done though Binghamtion Catholic Charities.I have been searching for 5years and nothing.Your birthname was Steven Micheal.I was 14 at the time and was not given a choice.I love you very much |
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Name: Karen Sconyers Email: Date: Tuesday September 27, 2005 02:57:02 GMT Comments: A month ago, I found my true
family. I want very much to help my true Mom to let go of the pain and hurt
she has carried for 52 years. How can help her? |
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Name: eric Email: Date: Tuesday July 05, 2005 10:02:00 GMT Comments: my girlfriend says we must put our baby up for adooption when it is born. we broke up. she has 2 others she's abanndonned. i hate this. i wannt the baby, nobody thiinks we can keep it annnd raiise it healthy. sorry my keyboard is crap. ii need gods help. help me to save my son god! he is ann iinnocent victim. |
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Name: Luciano Lupesi Boni Email: Date: Tuesday June 28, 2005 13:53:33 GMT Comments: My name is Luciano Lupesi Boni. I
am born on 08 th March 1940 at the old San Giovanni Hospital in Rome called
“Le Celate”. It was exclusively for women who wanted to remain
anonymous, some times giving birth with their faces completely covered.
"Le Celate" or (women who have decided to conceal their faces for
their own personal reasons), belonged to the upper middle-class of Rome.
Their pregnancies were sometimes the result of relatioships with highranking
fascists or influential persons of the upper middle-class. |
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Name: LESSA BROWN Email: Date: Saturday June 04, 2005 23:22:39 GMT Comments: My name is Lessa, I found your e-mail posted that you are searching for adoption information. I am writing to tell you about my experience in searching for my birthmother. I have always known that I was adopted, and yearned to know where I came from. After years of searching myself and only coming to dead ends, I contacted www.givenright.com , and they have changed my life. They were very compassionate and helpful gathering all of my information. I was really surprised how quickly they found my birthmother, they made the first contact with her to break the ice. Amazingly enough, she had been looking for me too. We were reunited two years ago and have created quite a relationship since. I have decided to share my experienced with www.givenright.com because I could not have done it with out them, and am forever grateful You can also reach them at 253-839-3666 |
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Name: Debbie Email: Date: Tuesday May 10, 2005 09:43:45 GMT Comments: There is VERY little help of counsellor in South Africa and websites like yours are most helpful. |
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Name: Loujean Stauffer Miller Email: Date: Sunday May 08, 2005 22:53:16 GMT Comments: Female adoptee DOB May 31, 1958 ISO Siblings & my Bomother who was born sometime in 1930. She may have lived in Oklahoma at one time. SHe had 2 other children born in 1949-50 & 1952-53 who were taken away by a member of her family. She may have been sick or somehow incapable of caring for them. She was divorced from older children's father and remarried to a man who may have worked for the railroad when I was born in 1958 but they were seperated by interfering family members. If any of this sounds familiar please contact me as I have more info. |
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Name: Ann Marie (Barrett) Nicholas Email: Date: Wednesday April 27, 2005 00:06:07 GMT Comments: thank you for expressing all that I went through when I had to give up my son.Its something or someone I can never forget, no matter what my family says, or believes. |
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Name: Jesse Jordan Email: Date: Tuesday April 26, 2005 21:28:09 GMT Comments: Thank you so much for your work.
I have been looking for my daughter for 45 years (without much luck). It is
recent research like yours that had helped me understand my periodic bouts of
depression and patterns of behavior were set when I was pregnant at 16. The
most obvious is a kind of passivity with life, just accepting what IS - even
the unacceptable - because there is nothing I can do to make anything
different. Hopefully, younger women will read and learn about the effects of
giving up a child - get some counseling so they don't waste as much of their
lives as I have still trying to just "forget about it", "move
on with my life", "the baby is better off", "you did the
right thing". You described a hole in one's soul. What a perfect
description. |
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Name: jennifer Email: Date: Thursday March 31, 2005 08:25:23 GMT Comments: Hello, I am e-mailing you to tell
you about our adoption forum. We invite you to join us. |
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Name: karen Email: Date: Sunday February 13, 2005 16:36:34 GMT Comments: I recently have been contacted by my daughter born 1965, I was surprised at all of the feelings that re-surfaced when this happened(and none were good). On reading your articles I realize that I am not alone with this. Unfortunately I live in a small town with no self help group available. Anyone out there have tips on how to proceed with this reunion? |
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Name: Joann Palazzolo Email: Date: Saturday February 05, 2005 05:52:13 GMT Comments: Thank you Judy for giving my pain a voice. I loved your entire thesis and I am represented all over it. I'm a birth mother (daughter, Sept, 1970), forced to relinquish my daughter to adoption. Best wishes, Joann, Michigan |
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Name: Mirah Riben Email: Date: Sunday January 09, 2005 20:08:19 GMT Comments: Anyone interested in more
information, please cotnact me at: |
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Name: Mirah Riben Email: Date: Sunday January 09, 2005 20:07:11 GMT Comments: I wish to propose the following to all mothers and fathers involved in – touched by – adoption in their lives in any way. It is a PROPOSAL for a new group, NOT another support group or online chat or discussion group. Plenty of those already exist to serve that need. Nor is it one to replace any existing group or organization in any way, but rather one with a very clear and specific purpose. One that I envision as becoming, possibly in the future if it grows to that point, a lobbying group. I see other grass roots mothers groups, such as MADD, as a role model because they rose up to meet a need to save the lives of theirs and others’ children, and are succeeding. |
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Name: Lori Email: xalleekatx@yahoo.com or Lori202@cox.net Date: Saturday November 27, 2004 02:48:18 GMT Comments: I am a FEMALE adoptee...BORN JUNE
10, 1961 in LOS ANGELES,CA. I was adopted in San Bernardino, CA @ 6 days old
through S.Bernardino County Welfare. Recently learned through papers from
agency that My BIRTHMOTHER was born in 1942 and was from WISCONSIN. If any of
this is familiar to you or someone you know please contact. Would very much
love to have any contact and to have the chance to know the beautiful woman |
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Name: renee rutz corbin Email: Date: Thursday November 25, 2004 15:59:11 GMT Comments: STILL LOOKING FOR CHRISOPHER SCOTT RUTZ BORN IN CLEVELAND OHIO,1970 OCT.17 AT DEPAUL SOCIET FOR UNWED MOTHERS, CLOSED ADOPTION,DO NOT KNOW IF REAL BIRTH CERT. WAS SENT TO ASHTABULA,CO. |
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Name: Erika Faulkner-Wnek Email: Date: Monday June 21, 2004 22:50:34 GMT Comments: All 3 of my children were adopted. 2 by my mother and my baby by his aunt who took him and moved away. i only saw him twice and i just can't seem to get my life together. I was a heavy drug user but i am now clean, i had no idia what was going on at the time and was forced into signing papers i never read or without anyone to explain them to me. i don't know what to do i feel so empty inside and i am not sure how long i can go on living. i am just so empty |
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Name: Tammy Email: Date: Friday April 23, 2004 19:36:20 GMT Comments: Looking for birth family. I was born July 21 1972 in Kitchener Ontario. Please contact! |
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Name: Barbara Richard (Naish) Email: Date: Friday March 26, 2004 23:27:12 GMT Comments: I gave up my son in Dec. 1964 in Ottawa, Ontario. I was 16 and totally dominated by my mother. I received no councilling and have not been able to have a proper relationship since. I have not found my son yet and hav e not been able to get on with my life even after all these years. If he reads this please contact me - I have never stopped loving you or your father. |
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Name: Shirley King Email: Date: Thursday March 18, 2004 02:00:54 GMT Comments: How would I go about finding a son I gave up in 1967 in a California state adoption? |
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Name: GUY CURRY (ONEAL) Email: Date: Wednesday February 18, 2004 21:37:52 GMT Comments: I AM LOOKING FOR MY SIBLINGS.AND MOTHER.CAN YOU HELP? I HAVE NAMES AND BIRTH DATES OF MY SIBLINGS. |
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Name: Debra Pinner Dickinson Email: Date: Monday January 26, 2004 00:17:04 GMT Comments: When My Daughters Grandparents
Forced Me To Sign The Adoption Papers I Had No Legal Counsel. I Was Young And
Didn't Know What My Rights Were. Not Only Was I Lied To By Their Grandparents
But So were My Daughters. But They Were Always Supposed To Be A Part Of My
Life. They Told Me That If I Didn't Let Them Adopt The Girls And We Went To
Court They Would Never Let Me See Them Again. They Lied Then Moved Them Out
Of State To Pavo Georgia. |
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Name: Debra Pinner Dickinson Email: Date: Monday January 26, 2004 00:07:37 GMT Comments: I Couldn't Get Everything In My
First Message. But The Last Place I Traced Them To Was The Church Of God Home
For Children Which Is Now The Greatsmokeymountain Home For Children In Seviersville
Tennessee. Before That They Lived In Pavo Georgia. I Got The Number To The
Home And Called But They Wouldn't Tell Me Anything. I Recently E-mailed The
Director There Paul Duncan Who Said That There Was Nothing He Could Do That
The Girls Were Grown Now But That If He Saw Them He Would Give Them My E-mail
Address. |
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Name: Debra Pinner Dickinson Email: Date: Monday January 26, 2004 00:01:56 GMT Comments: I Have Been Searching For My
Daughters For Many Years. My Story Is Proablly Different Than Some But Just
As Painful And Heart Breaking. There Names At Birth Was Michelle Lynn Burnett
04/30/73 Stacy Ann Burnett 06/17/75 And Rebecca Lynn Burnett 09/08/76 Born At
orange Memorial Hospital In Orlando Florida. Which Is Now Orlando Regional
Hospital. |
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Name: Joann Angelini or Jennifer Franco Email: Date: Saturday January 24, 2004 04:13:03 GMT Comments: Looking for son William P. Bader
born 1983 in Hinesville Georgia |
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Name: DEBBIE RAU Email: Date: Wednesday January 21, 2004 15:14:12 GMT Comments: I really dont know where to start,but Iam trying to find my husbands birthmom,he was adopted in michigan his adopted name is lawrence rau born in 1954 he was adopted in michigan when he was 7 months old we have been married 24 years and have 2 boys 25 & 20 we whould love to find her. his adoped parents are both deceased, he is missing so much maybe we can find her? |
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Name: hazel Email: Date: Sunday January 11, 2004 14:13:11 GMT Comments: Thank you for this web site it
has helped me understand i am not alone .i recently made contact with my
daughter and it brought back a lot of unresolved feelings.I had my daughter
in 1974 and i had very little suport it was a taboo subject |
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Name: Emma Crowely Email: Date: Thursday November 27, 2003 21:32:56 GMT Comments: Searching for son lost to adoption. Anyone who was at Florence Crittendon home Washington,DC?????? |
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Name: Sheila Email: Date: Friday October 10, 2003 20:28:38 GMT Comments: I am a birthmom, My daughter turned 23 yesterday. Happy Birthday to my "Angel". We made contact in July 2002 and every day knowing her has been a blessing. I just wish I could get over the guilt and pain that I have in my heart for not keeping her and loving her as a mom should......But the years of searching and all the pain and loss which I suffered was worth it when I saw her smile and held her close...Now if I could just find "Forgiveness" in myself......Good Luck to all of you searching.... |
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Name: james GOOD Email: Date: Sunday October 05, 2003 17:56:04 GMT Comments: Hello, |
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Name: Roselodge Email: Date: Saturday October 04, 2003 09:10:51 GMT Comments: You can't stop a mother's heart. You can't end her love. The creator gave the children to us, because the creator thinks we women are better. We women only do what we can do, but we do WHATEVER we can! Mother Earth gives us all she's got, one little apple can make 4 or 5 trees! She is not chintsey! This is why the Earth and the Creator particularly like all mothers, from alligators to humans. Mother Earth and The Creator also understand a mother's grief, and how hard it is for women. Because men are knuckle heads!This is how we Dakota see it. We have lost many children to adoption. We have cried a long time! |
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Name: Susan Boone Email: Date: Tuesday September 02, 2003 07:26:50 GMT Comments: In 1963, I put a beautiful baby
Boy up for adoption! |
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Name: Kim Kurtti Email: Date: Saturday August 30, 2003 01:21:27 GMT Comments: I am a birthmother, and i'm proud. I just wish my family would accept and support my difficult decision. My Adia Lynn was born on July 30, 2002. |
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Name: Andrew Pelek...... Email: Date: Tuesday August 26, 2003 18:29:54 GMT Comments: I’m a 34 year old Adoptee
& in the process of tracing. |
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Name: Brenda Email: Date: Wednesday July 16, 2003 00:37:44 GMT Comments: I just gave my son up for adoption on July 11th 2003. His birthday is the 9th, 2003. I am lucky enough to be in an extremly open adoption that includes some visiting, lots of phone calls, letters, and emails. Still it does not make it easier, if anything, it is harder because I know where he is, who he is with, and still I know that I cannot have him. The birth parents even gave him the middle name of Brendan (named after me, my name is Brenda). They live so close to me, and I thank god for bringing tem to me to give my son what he deserves and I couldn't give him at this time in my life. If anyone wants to talk to me, e mail me! |
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Name: Ruth Katz Erlich Email: Date: Thursday July 10, 2003 14:22:48 GMT Comments: I, too, gave up my son in Florida in 1964. It was a private adoption though a physician. I was 23 at the time. My life, although I have gone on and had married and divorced, I will for the rest of my life wonder where he is, if he is well and how he feels about my giving him up. My two girls know about their brother and want to find him, but I don't want to cause him any pain. Some days are better than others, today is not a good day. God bless you if you have found your child. I can only hope that he will try to find me. My love for him has never changed, with all my heart I think of him every day. |
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Name: Mary Email: Date: Tuesday July 01, 2003 02:33:15 GMT Comments: I am a reunited birthmom, 7 yrs! It was awesome at the start, but awkward now. Knowing him, the son I lost, is so painful and yet wonderful. I wish I'd had better support during the early years of reunion, maybe things would be better now. I don't know if the pain ever goes away. Bittersweet is the only way to describe it. I try to focus on my other children and grandchildren and pray. I want to connect with other birthmothers in my area, especially the older ones who are still in hiding. Getting the truth of who we are and what we've been through out in the open helps. Secrets and shame can kill us slowly! |
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Name: Amy Walthall Email: Date: Sunday June 29, 2003 18:03:37 GMT Comments: Being a birthmother who gave up
my child at the age of 16, I live with much grief of the unknown of what
happened to my child. It has been 22 years since I gave up my child and I
have still not been able to hold or see my child. I'm hoping that someday I
will heal and have the reunion with my birth son. |
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Name: Kathryn Email: Date: Saturday June 28, 2003 19:06:08 GMT Comments: My mother put her baby up for adoption
when she was seventeen,shes now fifty-two. they told her it was a boy she
told them she would not sign the papers until she got to hold her baby.when
she went to take off the dieper they took him from her. She often wonders if
it was really a girl.He was born in Salt Lake,Utah area, May 22 or 23,about
1969? they went through the LDS church. when I found out I had a brother out
there some where i might never know I instantly felt like I had lost
something.I want to find him but how would i start if i don't even know his
name? My mom (his birth mom)name when she had him was Patricia Lynn Woods.her
last name is now Kallas. If anyone could help me by any information on how to
start,phone numbers,people to talk to anything please e-mail me at KaKallas@aol.com.
Its been really hard for my mom not Knowing how hes been,if you are out ther
we love you |
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Name: Kim Warner Email: Date: Friday June 27, 2003 04:24:34 GMT Comments: I have watched my mom suffer for years. As I read this my heart broke for her.... she is the birthmother of a son (my brother) born on Christmas Day in Richmond,Va (196?) Birthname: Colbert Wayne ? I wish I could find and relieve her soul of the pain it has been tormentd with all these years Wherever you are WE LOVE YOU |
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Name: Genelda Cornelison Email: Date: Sunday May 18, 2003 03:27:43 GMT Comments: My son was born Dec 1964, I gave him up for adoption because at the time I had no way of providing for him and me and my family was told that was the best thing to do since I already had a daughter born in 1962. I still can not forgive myself for what I did. It was wrong for me but perhaps it works for some. |
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Name: karissa Elizabeth Ann Lowell Email: Date: Tuesday May 13, 2003 22:29:25 GMT Comments: This is so true. Adoption and Reliquishing your child for adoption has serious side-effects. I suffer from both. I am an adult adoptee and birth"mother". I suffer from AdultAdoptee Syndrome. |
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Name: Pamela A. Lowman Email: Date: Sunday April 20, 2003 20:43:37 GMT Comments: This study is very interesting.....maybe it can help birthmothers.. |
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Name: Lauri Greis Email: Date: Thursday March 27, 2003 16:49:17 GMT Comments: I am a 49 year-old adoptee who would like to thank my birthmother for giving me a wonderful life. From what was told to me about her situation, adoption was the most rational solution to her-and therefore my-dilemma. I have not pursued a search because I have no desire to interfere with a dear woman who may not have told her present family about her past. Remember, things were different back in 1953! In any event, I hope this message brings comfort to her and to the many others who are uncertain about their choice. |
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Name: Wendy Bradshaw Email: Date: Tuesday March 18, 2003 21:59:20 GMT Comments: I had a daughter in the summer of 1967. I blocked out that time of my life because of all the pain and hurt. Thats why the month is foggy and the day of the birth is some where in my head but can't bring it to the surface. This was in Tacoma Washington at Tacoma General Hospital. The horrible treatment that the hospital gave me was not suitable for any person. I want to find my daughter so bad but where do I start? The only reason I know that I had a dauthter was because the doctor's office by mistake sent my parents the bill, which was to be sent to the adoption parents. Please give me some advise as where to start. Thanks a heart that needs to be healed, Wendy Bradshaw |
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Name: Kathy Email: Date: Tuesday March 18, 2003 16:41:27 GMT Comments: I'm discovering so many tremendous sites for firstmoms. They have inspired me to begin again to search for my firstborn son. His birthday is 12/21/66. He was born at Good Samaritan Hospital in Cincinnati Ohio. I was living at St. Joseph's Infant & Maternity Home at the time. His adoption was arranged through the Catholic Social Services in Columbus Ohio. I named him Michael William. There is a huge void in my heart. |
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Name: Amy Email: Date: Tuesday March 11, 2003 03:38:00 GMT Comments: I would jsut like to say, that I
think the site is amazing. My |
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Name: tracy rauch Email: Date: Friday March 07, 2003 23:17:34 GMT Comments: I want to find my older sister,whom my mom had when whe was not married yet. Where do i start? We are from Winnipeg Manitoba Trixie1972@hotmail.com |
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Name: JOY Email: Date: Saturday March 01, 2003 06:10:34 GMT Comments: LOOKING FOR BIRTHMOTHER.....FEB 85 BOY..EMAIL ME THANKS. |
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Name: Lisa Email: Date: Thursday February 27, 2003 16:12:01 GMT Comments: My name is Lisa. I am 36 years old. I have been recently been blessed with my second child, a baby boy. My mother had a unusual reaction to the birth of this babyboy and I just found out yesterday why she reacted the way she did.... she gave up a baby boy when she was just 16 years old and he was 4 months old. My heart broke for her. She has kept this secret locked up inside for so long. While we were talking about what happened she told me that not a day goes by that she does not think of him. He would be 52 years old now. How do I start to look for him? Where do I begin? Could anyone help me mend this wonderful womans heart and give her some peace? |
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Name: Kim Email: Date: Tuesday February 25, 2003 15:14:44 GMT Comments: My husband is an adoptee and was
born in Memphis, TN on 12/7/1965. |
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Name: Rhonda Email: Date: Tuesday February 11, 2003 22:01:13 GMT Comments: I am an adoptee and a birthmother. I've been looking for my bmom for two years. This site has great meaning for me since I'm on both sides. I was born in Tulsa, OK on 01/04/1973 my birthname was Anna Marie. Thanks!! |
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Name: Kathy Lord Rouse Email: Date: Sunday February 02, 2003 13:14:36 GMT Comments: Looking for birth son.Born
7-14-81 in Jacksonville,Fl. at |
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Name: Sherry Email: Date: Friday January 24, 2003 15:57:37 GMT Comments: I came across this research project while surfing the net for research articals regarding relinquishment. I needed five (5) articals for a paper I'm writing for school. I too am a birthmother. |
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Name: karyn Email: Date: Tuesday January 14, 2003 22:49:17 GMT Comments: hi my name is karyn and I have been searching for many years for my husbands birth parents. Iam begining to wonder if anyone is looking for him i have been on every adoption web page and ancestor and genology page there has to be something or someone out there his name is mark his adoption papers say his birth name was michael john Dumas born march 29th 1960 at st. mary's hosp for unwed mothers in syracuse N.Y. in onadaga county there he was given to catholic charities in ogdensburg N.Y. then adopted to a nice family in watertown N.Y. both adopted parents are deceased. he has brown hair brown eyes 5ft 11in thank you any info would be greatly appreciated |
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Name: Wendy Cirinelli (birth name was...CATHERINE MARY POWER Email: Date: Tuesday December 31, 2002 01:52:49 GMT Comments: I was born OCTOBER 30th 1967 in
ST.JOHN's NEWFOUNDLAND CANADA..my name was Catherine MARY POWER...My BIRTH MOTHER
WAS BORN IN 1941, (99%sure) I was left with catholic orphans and adopted at
the age of 7months, I was taken to NEW JERSEY and raised by LOVING
"parents" I have had a great life, they gave me the sky, I just
have that same feeling ALL ADOPTED people have...A feeling of "missing
something" I need to know who I AM, WHO I LOOK LIKE? I dont need to
start a relationship, if it is NOT WELCOME,..Just need to feel complete!
ANYONE OUT THERE CAN HELP ME! :) |
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Name: Wendy Annette Hurt Thomas Hollon Email: Date: Sunday December 22, 2002 23:11:03 GMT Comments: My daughter Tina Michele Louise Hurt was taken from me in Gallatin TN in 1984 by a social worker by the name of Penny Porter. There was a big misunderstanding. She would be 21 years of age. Her birthday is December 19, 1981. I would love to meet her and let her know that I have been looking for her ever since she has been gone. Every time I would pass a lille girl with blonde hair and blue eyes I would turn and look back. I miss her so much and would like to tell her all the heart aches I have had looking for her I love her very much! |
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Name: slwtfe Email: Date: Monday November 18, 2002 20:38:44 GMT Comments: Born July 25, 1965 In? Birth mother went through Big Sisters league of Los Angeles, CA, Adopted parents went through another adoption agency. Mother left me at hospital. Desert Springs Hospital. Please contact me if you have any info on situation. Love to find out about each other. Oh yea! I favor my birth Dad by the info I have. That's if you wanted to know!!! |
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Name: Thomas Edward Miller Email: Date: Thursday November 14, 2002 19:59:32 GMT Comments: Agency: Onondaga County
Department of Social Services |
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Name: barbara mason Email: Date: Friday November 01, 2002 00:25:12 GMT Comments: i need help tring to fine birth son for 14years his birth name ronald wayne mason dob 2-22-1973 in st. louis mo. at the old depaul hospital.any info please e-mail me chrguf658@aol.com |
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Name: Veronica Krueger Email: Date: Thursday October 31, 2002 02:13:11 GMT Comments: I am an adoptee and a birthmother. |
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Name: Ray Buffer Email: Date: Tuesday October 29, 2002 08:13:48 GMT Comments: Your research has broadened my
perspective of the obstacles encountered by birthmothers. My relinquishment
happened in 1969. Thanks for your work. |
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Name: Vida Jean - From downunder Australia Email: Date: Tuesday October 22, 2002 12:51:58 GMT Comments: Hello! |
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Name: Sandy Budy Michel Email: Date: Wednesday October 02, 2002 19:55:57 GMT Comments: This site is the best tool I've
come across in a long time for understanding what birthmothers go through.
Thank you, Judy, from the bottom of my heart. |
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Name: GEORGINA M. MACDONALD Email: Date: Tuesday August 20, 2002 09:31:07 GMT Comments: MY DAUGHTER FOUND ME 3 YRS AGO - SHE FOUND OUT WHAT SHE WANTED TO KNOW AN NO LONGER WISHES TO SEE/TALK TO ME. PAIN - HURT - ANGER ARE ALL THERE. I LOVE HER BUT TO BE HONEST DO NOT LIKE HER. AM I THE ONLY ONE THIS HAS HAPPENED TO? |
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Name: Terri Boulton Email: Date: Monday August 12, 2002 02:49:57 GMT Comments: My daughters are looking for
their "birth grandparents". Their father was adopted as a baby. He was
born in the General Hospital in Calgary, Oct. 10/63 with his first two given
names "Micheal Terry". I believe his birthmother was 16 years old
at the time. His name is now Paul Alexander Barkauskas. I would like to
retrieve medical history information from his birthparents, and my one
daughter, who looks very much like her father, would like to meet her
grandparents. The two girls would very much like to have an opportunity to
meet one or both of their "birth grandparents". Please help if you
can. Thank you. |
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Name: Judianne Email: Date: Friday July 19, 2002 00:23:41 GMT Comments: Hi, I am a birthmother and I believe
that my daughter may have found me - she sounds like me - we share the same
allergies to meds and bees - and she even looks like me and my other
daughters ... we hope to have a face to face in less than a month... wish me
luck and I will return - |
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Name: Kadee Email: Date: Thursday July 18, 2002 12:39:29 GMT Comments: Birthmothers, PLEASE overcome any guilt or anything you may feel. I am an adoptee who was reunited on Dec. 21, 2001. I was able to get my records open due to having MS and found her, We spoke for the first time on that date--12-21-01, She PASSED AWAY JAN 10,2002! We had 3 weeks to tell each other how we loved and missed each other. I wanted a hug more then anything but we lived in different states and planned a face to face in summer. PLEASE DO NOT WAIT- There are lots of adoptees that hold no grudges, we just want your love now, especially if we were adopted to abusive homes. I wish she had known how to search or that I would have overcome my fear of abandonment and searched also so we had more time. each day that goes by is one less you'll be reunited. GO FOR IT-- YOUR KIDS ARE WAITING!! |
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Name: MB Email: Date: Thursday July 18, 2002 01:48:09 GMT Comments: I am an adoptee who found your site. I recently found my birthmother and we connected via email. I don't know what or if anything will become of it. I can accept whatever will happen - I am just so happy that my bmom had the courage to tell me she was my birthmom, send me some important medical and share a picture. I'd so much like to meet her one day and perhaps become friends...but I can accept it if she chooses not to want to do this. Thanks for the research on birthmothers. I have read many books on adoptees but there was not as much literature about birthmothers. Society has no idea about the truth of adoption for the birthmothers/fathers, adoptees, or adoptive parents. I had no idea myself about the truth and believed things that I was told that were not truth. Thank you Judy and everyone else out there for letting the truth shine through. |
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Name: Amy Email: Date: Wednesday July 10, 2002 16:46:09 GMT Comments: Thank you Judy!! Your courage to
pursue and share is precious. |
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Name: Lela B Email: Date: Thursday July 04, 2002 00:19:39 GMT Comments: I am the presistent daughter in law!
Nothing in my life brings me more happiness than seeing my husband and his
mother hug that first time and the smiles they both have on there faces in
all the pictures! We are living the Dream and it is great! More family more
love! Life is grand! |
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Name: jan hanson-beardslee Email: Date: Wednesday July 03, 2002 14:44:08 GMT Comments: I have been reunited with my son after 35 years thanks to the persistence of my new daughter-in-law. I never realized I had the option of reaching out to find him until recently. I now have grandchildren and my two 'younger' sons have found an older brother. I will read your book with delight. |
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Name: Diane Email: Date: Wednesday July 03, 2002 06:17:13 GMT Comments: I have not completely read Judy's message but know that I have been looking for my son, born 12/9/65, St. Lukes Hospital, Boise, Idaho, a private adoption arranged by Dr. Franklin David, for many years. The records of this adoption are lost, hidden, whatever and no one seems to be able or willing to help. I have always suffered alone, but realize now that I have not been alone, just in the dark by myself. Hope that prayers and with some good luck, will be reunited with my son, who is with me everyday of my life. |
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Name: Robin Email: Date: Saturday June 29, 2002 10:53:12 GMT Comments: My partner is an adoptee, and we have been considering adoption. Something deep inside of me called to the pain of the birthmother. I just had this feeling that no one was talking about the overwhelming loss. I couldn't see how someone could carry a child, and give them up with ease. I don't want to contribute to this pain. We were thinking about international adoption, and I had this concern that these women were being coerced into giving away their children. I know there are many open adoptions now, what is the state of things now? |
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Name: Sarah Jordan Email: Date: Sunday May 12, 2002 23:03:30 GMT Comments: As a bm, I've heard a lot about how bad protection for bms was in the 60s, and how much better it is today. This is flatly not true. Despite all the "protections" supposedly available, I was denied counseling, and not informed of the nature of the documents I was signing. I was continually assured I was at no risk of losing my daughter, and I would eventually see the wisdom of adoption. Yet I had to sign 'medical documents' right after the birth and have not been able to get her back. She will be a year old this week, and I have yet to see court. I am 24, married and in college. I had a lot of concerns about myself as a mother, which I was advised were not normal, but reasons to give her up. I think this is kidnapping, and am appalled at the lack of resources for bms, or the possibilities of recourse in a case like mine. For the last year, my life has been a wzalking nightmare. |
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Name: Judy Email: Date: Thursday April 25, 2002 22:28:35 GMT Comments: I applaud your courage to tackle such a research project. It was most therapeutic for you I am sure. As a birthmother, I appreciate the voices of those who answered you questionaire. The hole left by relinquishment is never filled is it, even in the best of reunions. This is the burden we birthmothers take to the grave of never being able to fill the hole or not feel the pain of loss. Thank you for doing this study. |
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Name: Kathy C. Email: Date: Sunday April 21, 2002 21:19:29 GMT Comments: For over twenty years I've grieved the loss of my only child, my son, who was lost to adoption in 1978. Trying to get some help and support has been a nightmare. Thank you, for the information in "Birthmother Research Project." |
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Name: Susan Bethea Email: Date: Wednesday April 10, 2002 10:01:43 GMT Comments: I am a recent birthmom of a five
month old girl. I have started a community in MSN for open adoption birthmoms
to give support to each other both past and present. |
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Name: Moira Kathleen (Kathie) Crouch Email: Date: Tuesday April 09, 2002 21:13:24 GMT Comments: Thank you for posting "BIRTHMOTHER RESEARCH PROJECT". As a birthmother who gave up her daughter four days after her birth in 1966 and who has not yet found her child, I am still dealing with the pain and anguish that has not lessened. |
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Name: cathy Email: Date: Tuesday April 09, 2002 19:07:09 GMT Comments: i found 2 children and it was not a good thing..while i was ready they were not..their adoptions were to abusive homes..the very thing i was trying to save them from |
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Name: Karen Cayford Email: Date: Sunday April 07, 2002 05:33:42 GMT Comments: I, too, "accidentally" found your Birthmother Research Project while desperately trying to find some support out there. I gave up my son in 1985; I was 26 at the time; the birthfather was black/married; I was white/single. I lived in Texas. I felt my child would suffer not having 2 parents. And that was the line I was fed. Now I am full of rage, anger at my parents, the maternity home counselor, the whole adoption system. Thank you for your immense courage in undertaking this project. Without my Lord, I would not be alive today. |
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Name: Darlene Email: Date: Sunday March 31, 2002 07:51:00 GMT Comments: I "accidentially" found this site and it is amazing to me that after 7 years since my reunion with my son, I see how I'm still so affected by the relinquishment. I am prepared to do further healing and I'm ever so thankful that I found this site and look forward to joining a support group of birthmothers. Thank you for your work. |
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Name: leanna Email: Date: Wednesday March 27, 2002 18:13:48 GMT Comments: iso birth parents born march 25,1970 in Vancouver bc |
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Name: Dorine Akey (Maxwell) Email: Date: Monday March 25, 2002 20:55:04 GMT Comments: My name is Dorine and I am
looking for my daughter |
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Name: TODD COMER Email: Date: Saturday March 16, 2002 18:06:14 GMT Comments: I am looking for my birth mother. I was born in wilmington north carolina on 8-18-71. Mom if you are out there and you read this please touch base with me. I am not looking for anything from you just what is missing from this hole that has eaten away at me for years. I know I have at least one sister out there to so please contact me. |
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Name: Donna Email: Date: Monday March 11, 2002 18:23:02 GMT Comments: I am searching for my birth
mother. I was born in fairfax, virginia on july 15, 1965. "this stirring
article brought |
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Name: Kathie Ann Kniffin Email: Date: Saturday March 02, 2002 20:38:28 GMT Comments: I am loking 4 my sister. Robin Frances D.O.B. 6 June 66. You were adopted either Oct 66 or Nov 66. Out of New London conn.you were a very sick baby and there was 5 of us at home. She misses u terribly and she is sick. I hope u reach us soon. We all love u sis. |
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Name: barbara Schaefer Email: Date: Saturday February 23, 2002 21:51:37 GMT Comments: Search for birthmother of my son, born 29 Apr 1965 at the Martha Washington in Milwaukee (Wauwatosa-Cedar St) WI. Son anxious to know geneology and medical. |
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Name: Teresa A. Sheppard Curtis Email: Date: Tuesday February 05, 2002 20:48:00 GMT Comments: I am a birthmother having given birth to a girl, 9/20/1965, St. Joseph Hospital, Pierce County, Tacoma, Washington. I had not stopped to think that I was not the only one woman in extreme pain for so many years. Your project has enlightened me to why I've always felt disfunctional and not deserving of many things. I am trying to understand myself, but it is difficult with the hole in my soul and in my heart and my pain. I am starting my search for my daughter now. Thank you for sharing. |
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Name: kelly Email: Date: Monday January 28, 2002 03:35:11 GMT Comments: hi have just started communicating with my birhthmother. i am 45 years old.. i am trying so hard to help her understand that she is not a bad person for doing what she was told to do... she has such guilt feelings... i would love to talk to birth mothers that might be able to shed some light on this for me.. |
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Name: Sheila Ann Email: Date: Saturday January 05, 2002 21:41:09 GMT Comments: Judy thank you so much for this wonderful site. I am a birthmother who for the last three years has been reunited with my beautiful daughter. She was coerced from me when I was sent to a Florence Crittenton Home in Terre Haute, Indiana. If anyone from the FCH in the year of 1961 is still around I would love to talk to them. Even under such dire circumstances we did form many friendships and shared so many dreams of finding a way to keep our child with us. But back then we didn't have a chance having no idea what our rights were or that we even had any. I thank God every day that He blessed me with my birthdaughter twice in my life. God Bless All of You, Sheila Ann |
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Name: Sloan Bland Email: Date: Tuesday September 25, 2001 05:30:36 GMT Comments: I found the son I gave up for adoption last year after 33 years of looking. He was born in 1967. I got no counseling, just lies and more lies. Everything was fine for awhile and now I have no contact with him at all and don't have a clue as to why. He and his adopted family just withdrew! And I and my family are left wondering why? |
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Name: Brenda Email: Date: Wednesday April 11, 2001 01:35:54 GMT Comments: Thank you for starting this site, it is awful how much it
hurts to give up your child...I did 23 yrs ago. It was by far the hardest
thing i have EVER had to do. But God is good, i have reconciled with him 4
days ago. He wants to meet me, maybe this summer! Thank you, Brenda Name: Mary S Email: Date: Thursday December 27, 2001 21:01:32 GMT Comments: I just viewed a few pieces of
Kelly's artwork, Shattered Reality and Grief......reminds me of artwork my
firstborn had painted, which I saw at her memorial service. She took a gun
and ended her life. I had felt such a strong desire to take down my own walls
of defences and to let her really know me as a person, but I waited too long
and now my opportunity is lost forever, and so is her opportunity for peace.
My daughter's artwork depicted featureless faces, and a sillouette with a
heart bleeding down her body and never ending. I'm still trying to write to
her mom, and express my sympathy for their loss. I am so grateful for the
love and care they provided her, and so disappointed that even after 20
years, I still didn't have myself together enough to not be ashamed to let
her know me intimately. I am glad this site is here to help us all understand
our personal traumas. Name: Diane Kiper Email: Date: Wednesday November 28, 2001 18:25:44 GMT Comments: I am making copies of your thesis
for every member of my family to read! I want every member of my extended
family to read it because it so clearly and poignantly validates my sister's
trauma and pain since her baby's adoption in 1969. Thank you. Name: Tina Email: Date: Wednesday October 31, 2001 16:45:41 GMT Comments: I too am a birthmother of a
daughter born April 18, 1972. She recently found me and we have been getting
to know each other and your research project was really good for me to read
to understand that instead of being all alone trying to sort out all my
anger, my fears and my pain, I really have lots of others that share my
unique kind of pain. Thank you for taking the time to first of all do this
project and secondly to share it with everyone. Sincerely, Tina Firks Name: Meg Braun Email: Date: Monday October 29, 2001 14:50:46 GMT Comments: Mom, where are you? I was born
July 1, 1965 at Willows Maternity Hospital in KCMO. I don't want to say too
much about my adoption but it has been very difficult. My adoptive mother is
an alcholic and has frankly caused a lot of problems in my life. I am trying
to heal. I guess I'm hoping that finding you might help. Name: Kathy Email: Date: Thursday October 04, 2001 14:35:34 GMT Comments: My birthmother is closing in on
70. I have been looking Name: Catherine Houdek Email: Date: Wednesday October 03, 2001 20:34:58 GMT Comments: I have an open adoption and have
visited my son several times. The only thing I carry stashed deeep in my soul
is the grief and I've become numb. Any suggestions how to deal with the grief
personally without going to counseling? Name: Sloan Bland Email: Date: Tuesday September 25, 2001 05:30:36 GMT Comments: I found the son I gave up for
adoption last year after 33 years of looking. He was born in 1967. I got no
counseling, just lies and more lies. Everything was fine for awhile and now I
have no contact with him at all and don't have a clue as to why. He and his
adopted family just withdrew! And I and my family are left wondering why? Name: Sandra Willis Email: Date: Sunday September 16, 2001 22:16:29 GMT Comments: I am looking for other
birthmothers in my position. I had a child with very severe birth defects. I
could not care for her the way she needed and I had to relinquish her. I have
always known where she was and we have had contact though not for a few years
now. She is 22 now. I really need to talk to someone in the same situation.
Her foster parents could not love her any more if she was their child by
birth, and mostly it has been a good thing for her. But I am so hurting
inside. I really need to talk to someone who understands first hand and may
be able to help me. The pain and guilt have not decreased over the years, in
fact they have increased. When I talk about her I am upset for days afterward
sometimes. It is a very complex situation and I will be so thankful if anyone
can give me some advise. Name: Rosemary Email: Date: Tuesday September 11, 2001 14:13:34 GMT Comments: A most beneficial thesis...gratitude
and congratulations. Name: STEVE COLLETTE Email: Date: Sunday September 09, 2001 15:18:44 GMT Comments: ISO MARTHA JOANE WARNICK (maiden
name). She was born in BONAPARTE, IOWA. I know she lived in Sioux City, Iowa
in 1953. I was born CARL WAYNE WARNICK on Nov. 3, 1953 at 5:30 pm in St.
Joseph hosp. (now called Mercy hosp.) Any help in my search would be very
greatfull. Name: Elizabeth L, McLean Email: Date: Monday September 03, 2001 23:23:54 GMT Comments: Thank you so much for all the
work you did with your research. It helps me to know that I am not alone and
validates my feelings. Name: Carole Weber Email: Date: Tuesday August 21, 2001 18:38:46 GMT Comments: Today is my first grandson's
birthday. He is fourteen. I needed to say even though birthparents go through
tremendous emotions, I was curious why the birth-grandparents are seldom
mentioned. The parents of the teen-aged pregnant daughter are typically very
young (I was 39 years old) and I have frequently searched the internet for
some information for my daughter as well as myself. I am just guessing that
information for the grandparents would be supportive emotionally also. Thanks
for listening. Happy Birthday to Andrew with love and tears - Grandma. Name: Leonne Willie Email: Date: Thursday August 16, 2001 00:08:04 GMT Comments: hi my name is Leonne Willie It
was Leonne Dubeau before i got married Iam trying to fine my daughter that i
gave up in Oct.13.1969 born in toronto father is east india and me french
canadian iamchopeing to fine her and to let her no that she has a sister and
a newphe how is 4 years old now Name: Anita Lee DeVinney formerly known as Maria Teresa Scaglione Email: Date: Wednesday August 08, 2001 04:34:55 GMT Comments: Looking for my birth mother. Her
name is Maria F. Scaglione. I was born in Rome, Italy on December 6, 1960.
Please help me find her. I would like to know my medical history. Name: Tom Kovacs Email: Date: Saturday August 04, 2001 04:05:50 GMT Comments: I am looking for my birth
parents. I was born on January 9,1969 at Community Hospital Indianapolis, Indiana.
All I know is my birth mother possibly was in beauty school at the time. I
was raised as an only child and would like to know if I have siblings. I am
the father of 2 now and would like to know you. Name: Robin Geiger Email: Date: Thursday August 02, 2001 21:25:44 GMT Comments: I am a 26 yr old female looking
for my birthparents. I was born in Lincoln, Nebraska on May 12, 1975. I just
want to talk to them. My adoptive mother passed away in 1994 I would like to
find my bmother. I have no information about the bmother or the bfather. I
have 3 children now and need to find out about medical records. If anone has
any information pleasse contact me. Name: Rose Garcia Email: Date: Monday July 30, 2001 18:03:59 GMT Comments: I am a birthmother who gave up my
daughter for adoption in 1971. I joined ALMA (Adoptee Liberty Movement
Association)the same year, and later I subscribed to PSN (People Searching
Newsletter). It was through this wonderful newsletter that I was able to find
my daughter, and reunited with her on her exact 18th birthday in March 28,
1989. She now has a child of her own making me a very proud grandmother. I do
not see them often as we live in different states, but is always a delight to
see them whenever possible. To those of you who are still searching, my
advice is: NEVER, NEVER GIVE UP. Your time will come. My heart goes out to
all of you as I know how hard it is to wait. Name: Heather Email: Date: Sunday July 08, 2001 01:39:43 GMT Comments: Hello I am adopted I was born on
10/10/70 my natrual mother signed up with ISSR when I turned 18 and I signed
up about a month ago they called me telling me there was a match. But that
they needed to contact her. She hasnt responded and I really wish she would
she was only 14 yrs old when she had me her first name is Jessena and she is
from North Carolina but her family brought her to Florida I was born in Cape
Canaveral Hospital. I have read all of the notes in the guest book and am
hoping that she would read mine.. Name: Heather Email: Date: Sunday July 08, 2001 01:39:13 GMT Comments: Hello I am adopted I was born on
10/10/70 my natrual mother signed up with ISSR when I turned 18 and I signed
up about a month ago they called me telling me there was a match. But that
they needed to contact her. She hasnt responded and I really wish she would
she was only 14 yrs old when she had me her first name is Jessena and she is
from North Carolina but her family brought her to Florida I was born in Cape
Canaveral Hospital. I have read all of the notes in the guest book and am
hoping that she would read mine.. Name: Donna Valdivia Email: Date: Saturday June 16, 2001 05:24:58 GMT Comments: Unreal. It seems like we all feel
the same way. What a blessing to be reunited with my birthdaughter. She was
born 3 days after my 19th Birthday in April 1972. Dana now I know her name
was 29 this year. I love her very much. Without the hands of God helping her
and the support of her adoptive parents I'm thankful. I'm a member of the
sunflower birthmother group. Very supportive group and this site is
wonderful. I fit every profile as well. Thank you so much Judy. Your also a
gift from God. To all the birthmothers out there, remember the words the
people told us, sign and go on with your life. Well if they could see us
know, reunited with our Children. I wish these people could of lived with the
pain for all the years we lived. God bless all of you. Name: Susan Kay Huizinga Email: Date: Tuesday June 12, 2001 16:14:42 GMT Comments: Hi, I am 31 years old and I am
looking for my Birthmother, I was born at Booth hospital on 2/27/70 and I was
adopted through Bethany Christian Services. I live in Grand Rapids Mi. and
was born there. They say my mother had 11 brothers and sisters and lived in
White Cloud, She had a little girl and had a son. I would really like to meat
her. Name: Ann Marie Email: Date: Wednesday May 09, 2001 20:00:40 GMT Comments: What an amazing study. Absolutely
right on. I relinquished my daughter in 1976 and the situation was exactly
the same. Truly a remarkable study. Thank you so very much. Name: Susan Oliver Email: Date: Wednesday April 18, 2001 21:04:41 GMT Comments: My son's adoptive mother is so
damned mean. She is threatened, jealous, dishonest, and manipulative. I give her
respect and honor because she nurtured my baby when I couldn't. Why can't she
give me respect and honor because I gave him life? I do not understand the
adoptive parents' perspective and I doubt that I ever will. They were given a
child to love and raise. Why can't they share a little piece? Name: Annie Day Email: Date: Monday April 16, 2001 01:39:00 GMT Comments: You know something? Our babies have
their own life now - so if we get in contact with them... be ready to be
strong, be ready to put away the pain - girls - its all part of motherhood -
be ready for more sacrifice and don't hurt your grown up child -I've found my
boy - he doesn't have to the depth of this pain - you know what i mean Name: Brenda Email: Date: Wednesday April 11, 2001 01:35:54 GMT Comments: Thank you for starting this site,
it is awful how much it hurts to give up your child...I did 23 yrs ago. It
was by far the hardest thing i have EVER had to do. But God is good, i have
reconciled with him 4 days ago. He wants to meet me, maybe this summer! Thank
you, Brenda Name: Valerie Leighen Hopps Email: Date: Saturday April 07, 2001 23:17:45 GMT Comments: march 27 1970 Richmond BC female Name: Barbara J.kent (Walker) Email: Date: Friday April 06, 2001 22:41:52 GMT Comments: I am in search of Birth parents Name: Maureen McNamara Email: Date: Thursday March 29, 2001 00:18:21 GMT Comments: I wish I could have been in this
study. It is still unbeliveable,how many people do not understand the grief Name: Barbara Email: Date: Wednesday March 28, 2001 04:04:42 GMT Comments: I was pleased and overwhelmed
that your article struck so close to home. Memories that have been kept under
wraps for more than 30 years have surfaced. I have shared them with my
daughters, and am so thankful they will never have to endure such an event Name: Kathy Henderson Email: Date: Tuesday March 27, 2001 18:03:25 GMT Comments: I am a hurting Mom for 29 long
years for a child I basically was driven to give my child up for adoption
from my family because if was born of biracial, I am white and Dad is black.
We both desperately want to find the child who will soon be 30 years old,
this November. I cannot express the hurt we both have gone through these many
years, but with only the child being able to open the sealed files in the
state of Alabama, my one fear has always been, he does not know he was
adopted, so how can he know to search for his birthparents? It hurts deeply
that I do not know anything about him, always wondering. Name: Jacqui Email: Date: Friday March 23, 2001 02:12:15 GMT Comments: I placed my son for adoption 2
years ago and it is somewhat open. I am currently writing a paper in college
on the effects of children who are placed in closed adoptions. Thank you for
your website it has provided much information. It upsets me that society
thinks we do no damage to a child when he is denied his place of origin.
Closed adoption is truly for the adoptive parents. It is the child that
suffers, as does the birthmother. Name: kathleen dempsey mcdemott Email: Date: Wednesday March 14, 2001 17:13:46 GMT Comments: looking for daughter who was born
in 1/1973 at columbia hospital for women in washington dc. at time of birth
elizabeth was the name i gave her. put up for adoption in baltimore in 1973.
kathleen dempsey was my maiden name and lived in mt rainier md at time of
birth. father's name is on not the birth cerft. put know who he is. Name: Victoria Moore/Northam Email: Date: Tuesday March 13, 2001 23:23:00 GMT Comments: I'm trying to find my daughter
Birth name was Chastity DOB 7/23/70. Father last name is Greenhill.WE really
want to find you please get touch right away. I've hit so many block walls
and legal walls. You have a brother too,and we are hopeing you see this and
know how much you are loved. Name: Betsi Westling` Email: Date: Thursday February 22, 2001 19:08:13 GMT Comments: I have not read your thesis yet,
I plan to, but I have read through your posts of birthmothers searching, and
truly my heart goes out to them. I am the mother in law to an adoptee, who
has been searching undauntingly for the last 14 yrs, and I really needed to
hear a birthmothers perspective on this. I feel the pain, and my heart goes
out to each and every one of you, I cry too, for, there is nothing in this
world that I would rather do than to give my sweet daughter in law the gift
of her roots, most especially her "mother's" loving arms. I will
pray for all of you. My Love, Betsi ISO birthmother for daughter-in-law born
May 5, 1970, Brooklyn, NY birthmother's maiden name LAMONICA Name: B Email: Date: Tuesday February 20, 2001 01:58:13 GMT Comments: female adoptee,DOB 8-11-66,taken
by Hamilton cty.welfare dept.final adoption decree,11-28-72.I was about 5
yrs.I miss my brother,and want to say thankyou for caring for me.they all
thought being taken kicking and screaming was cute.I found it to be
horrifying,and etched in my mind forever.Only to find I was never coming
back.od be w/all of us.Until w eet again. Name: Don Email: Date: Saturday February 17, 2001 11:28:09 GMT Comments: At least birthmothers get to see
the child,more than i ever got as a birtfather,allmost 40 years ago and i'm
still angrey. Name: Leslie Email: Date: Friday February 16, 2001 15:55:07 GMT Comments: I am doing most of the legwork in
my fiancee's search for his BIRTHMOTHER. He was born DUANE JORDAN ZIMMERMAN
on 3-19-63 at COLORADO GENERAL HOSP/DENVER,COLORADO. His Birthmother is
believed to have been at BOOTH SALVATION ARMY HOME. Her name is believed to
be Cathy Zimmerman. Name: Alicia F. Garcia Email: Date: Friday February 09, 2001 23:35:53 GMT Comments: Hi i too have been tring to find my
daughter..i am registered on the birth quest site for the last 4 yrs..have
yet not located her birth criteria...was informed to further the search i
would need around 500.oo to get any more results;;i have been in and out of
the hospital the last few yrs also ,,i just want her to know that i am here
and available to have her in my life. that i have always loved her ..and
would love for her to allow me to know her.. and that she has a brother...
and i feel thhat she may me on a search of her own...dob...Oct.13. 1969...
any further assistance you might direct me to would greatly be appreciated..
thank you for a wonderfully need outlet and servic...alice Name: BARBARA HANKS TREVEY Email: Date: Wednesday February 07, 2001 02:37:10 GMT Comments: THIS IS A GREAT SITE. Name: Kasey Email: Date: Saturday February 03, 2001 02:55:36 GMT Comments: I have begun my search..This time
I'm not giving up until I find you...You were born on May 14,1969 in Seattle,
Wa. Your a great man now and I have always loved you. Waiting. Name: Deb Hughston Email: Date: Sunday January 28, 2001 03:27:43 GMT Comments: My mother gave up a baby boy in
1960 at Fresno Community Hospital Name: Pamela Ann Walsh Email: Date: Sunday January 28, 2001 03:23:42 GMT Comments: Birthmothers and Adoptees need
suport groups after they find each other. I know I have felt so left out now and
confused after two months of knowing my son. Others who have never been in my
shoes, say wait give it time, well enought time has been waisted, now is the
time to form that relationship, so no mixed messages get in the mind of
birthmother and Adoptee. Name: Elisa Borgatti Email: Date: Thursday December 28, 2000 19:14:32 GMT Comments: Hi! I was born on 4/11/72 in the South Carolina Baptist Hospital in Columbia, SC and adopted through Catholic Charities of Charleston, SC. My birthmother was 19 years old, originally from New York, of Lithuanian heritage, blonde, blue eyes, high school grad. My birthfather was 20 years old, blonde, blue eyes, college student majoring in psychology. EITHER LAST NAME MAY BE PIKE OR PECK. Thanks! Name: melanie cohen Email: Date: Wednesday December 20, 2000 00:35:38 GMT Comments: hi my name is melanie cohen and my sister and i were given up at the ages 3 and 4 we were born at 8404bayparkway,brooklyn,ny and we are lookin for our older sister elizabeth cohen or our mother if anyone nows anything please e mail me at djmikegold@aol.com thank you Name: David L Betts Email: Date: Friday November 24, 2000 09:50:50 GMT Comments: Looking for bmom I was born on April 1 1969 older sister born on feb24 1968 recentily talked to her for first time we are looking for you bmom name at that time for all where david lee noble (bfather)june noble(bmom)virginia june noble(DOB 2/24/68)david lee noble jr. 4/1/69 adopted name of david lee betts also have 2 younger half brothers Rex alan/howard lee last know location of bmom was Burlington Ia. me and sister where born in Iowa City Iowa her Bmom last know name was june buckley PLEASE GET AHOLD OF US WE LOVE YOU MOM Name: Amy Hooper Email: Date: Wednesday November 22, 2000 19:41:08 GMT Comments: Iam recently searching for bmom.DOB4-20-70 No regrets whatever the circumstances,I truly understand.Please e-mail with any info.Peace and joy to everyone searching. Name: Mary Lou Boggiano-Smith Email: Date: Friday November 10, 2000 00:14:52 GMT Comments: Your paper has validated my life. I gave birth to my son in 1965 and was reunited with him on his 32nd birthday. What a joy he has brought to my life! I no longer feel the tremendous loss that I did for so long. Name: Sharon Email: Date: Monday November 06, 2000 19:03:01 GMT Comments: I read your paper with much interest...I
too am a birth mother in search of my son...I am presently writing about the
pregnancy, reliquishment and adoption related issues attached to my
experiences...Thirty years later and I am still reeling from it all. I wear
it well though and recognize that there are two me's that I must deal with on
a regualr basis. Thank you for your insights! Name: barbara adams Email: Date: Tuesday October 31, 2000 19:30:26 GMT Comments: I am a birthmother who fits the profile of this study. I thought that when I gave my son up at 17 I had done the right thing and would be able to put it behind me but I was very wrong. I am fortunate enought that my son found me almost two years ago now and has been most loving and accepting of me and we are building a relationship together. I am at a poit that I need to make contact with other birthmothers so am writing this now. If there is a way that I might be able to help you or someone you know because of my backgroung please let me know. How is it that we are such a substantial group that is so deep in the shadow of the societal consciousness? Is there some way that I can, by myself or with others help someone out there make a difference in the adoption world's consciousness? Name: Sandra Feher Email: Date: Thursday August 24, 2000 12:37:30 GMT Comments: I gave my son up for adoption in August 1980. I have just begun my search to see if I can find him. I am hoping that I am sucessful in my search. Name: Karen Berklund Email: Date: Sunday July 30, 2000 15:34:17 GMT Comments: Dear Judy Name: Darlene Gerow Email: Date: Friday July 21, 2000 21:43:17 GMT Comments: Thank you for your work. It confirms and validates all the things that I've experienced and learned as a birthmother. Name: Eleanor Whitmore Email: Date: Friday July 14, 2000 04:53:10 GMT Comments: Your research tells the sad and
tragic truth, further Name: Denise Connelly Email: Date: Saturday July 08, 2000 22:09:14 GMT Comments: Really touched me.Now I feel I can identify with my birthmother. Was born 7-12-62 in Baltimore, MD.Relinquishment papers signed 9-62.Placed thru Catholic Charities.Baptized St.Charles Borremo.Adoption finalized 11-21-63.Searching for birthfamily.Italian,Irish,German,English heritage.Name at birth Mary Catherine. Any info. mcdconn@juno.com Name: Cari Bennett Email: mailto:Bennrow@hotmail.com,%20Bennrow@juno.com Date: Thursday June 08, 2000 21:53:29 GMT Comments: I am a BMom ISO of my daughter.
She was born April 11, 1978 at High Plains Baptist Hospital in Amarillo, TX.
The doctor's name was Breeden. The Adoption Agency was Catholic Family
Service. The counselor's name was Peggy Cooney. If anyone knows of her or you
are her, Please contact me. I have always loved you and have had you in my
thoughts and prayers for the past 22 years. Name: anna Butler-Moran Email: anna@dreamwarden.freeserve.co.uk Date: Tuesday May 30, 2000 18:37:44 GMT Comments: What a lovely site........the
photo sums up exactly how Name: sue Email: Date: Monday May 15, 2000 14:25:29 GMT Comments: MISSOURI just started to look gave up daughter 11/??/1972 born in north kansas city memorial hospital. ADOPTION THROUGH SS IN LIBERTY MISSOURI. Name: Andrea Nellis Email: Date: Sunday May 14, 2000 20:48:07 GMT Comments: Hi! I am a Birthmother living in Ontario, Canada. I am really wanting to add my info to any registration for adoptee's searching for thier birthparents. Any help with addresses or websites would be appreciated. This is the beginning of my search for my Birthdaughter. Thank you. Name: MARCELAS Email: Date: Tuesday May 09, 2000 17:43:08 GMT Comments: JUST LOOKING FOR MY BIRTHMOM Name: Bonnie Price Email: Date: Monday May 08, 2000 03:32:43 GMT Comments: This was a great source or comfort to my friend who has just begun the experience of being a "birthmother. Name: Jackie Perez Email: Date: Sunday May 07, 2000 13:37:07 GMT Comments: I to am a birthmom searching for
my birth son.And i dont think the pain ever goes away, and the longing to find
that part of me that is gone.My son was born in Pensacola,Florida at
University Hospital on July 18,1971 at 4:28pm.his birthname Harold Donald
Baker .Iwas 13 years old went i had him.I kept him til he was 2 or 3 months
old .My maiden name Jackie Lorraine Brazwell. Name: Sherri Email: Date: Friday May 05, 2000 11:15:43 GMT Comments: I am a birthmother in search of my son that was born in Jacksonville, Florida on November 15, 1970 at 11:11pm in St. Vincent's Hospital. His birth weight was 7lbs. 7oz. and at birth he had white blonde hair and blue eyes. He was delivered by c-section and the attending physicians were Dr. Timothy Phelan, Dr. Allgood, and Dr. Schweitz. His adoption was arranged through the Children's Home Society, Buckner Division, Jacksonville, Florida. Name: Linda-R-Rocquebrune Email: Date: Thursday May 04, 2000 23:21:37 GMT Comments: I was named Jacqueline at birth,
4/27/53, at St Marys Hospital, Montreal, My birthmother is Scottish/Canadian,
My father is said to be American and/or Austrailian, If you are my
birth-mother or birthrealative I would love to hear from you! Please see my
childhood photo and more details at Name: Michelle Email: Date: Saturday April 29, 2000 18:44:55 GMT Comments: Am looking for male born Sept. 08 1969 Birthname Geoffery Bafik. State of birth De. Would like to see if you are all I know you can be. Name: Michelle Email: Date: Saturday April 29, 2000 18:40:06 GMT Comments: It's not everyday I think of you,but you are always in my heart. Name: Caroline J Olson Email: Date: Thursday April 27, 2000 08:50:44 GMT Comments: I won 123 million dollars and I
need to find my original parents to share this with? Please I'm lonely and
desperate to have their love once again. Name: teri kreitzberg Email: Date: Friday April 21, 2000 02:25:19 GMT Comments: i am a birthmother (1968) and as
i read your thesis i saw myself unfold like the pedal on a flower. i gasped,
cried, rocked, waled, and sat dumbfounded.....i'm not alone. everything i have
felt for 32 yrs has been normal , at least to 6,000,000 females......This is
truly an amazing study and so well written. congratulations on your paper and
more importantly on your REUNION with your SON. Name: Jackie Sears Email: Date: Friday April 14, 2000 10:56:27 GMT Comments: Thanks so much for your brilliant thesis. I relinquished a daughter over 33 years ago and reunited with her for her 33rd. birthday. I have realized since finding her that I did experience an inability to get on with the rest of my life despite the fact that I married and had three children, achieved a postgraduate education and a successful career. I did sign a confidentiality waiver with the adoption agency. When I reunited with my daughter, I learned that she had gone to that agency 7 or 8 years ago to inquire and they told her that they didn't keep very good records in the '60's. I also was given a fake name. I returned to a world lacking in support and understanding. In a nutshell, you have painted me, and I applaud you. Name: P. Saint Email: Date: Friday April 14, 2000 09:24:13 GMT Comments: Searching for son adopted from Sheffield, Colbert County, AL. DOB 07/19/1965. Birth name Charles Allen Saint, adopted name is John. Feel I have depleated all areas. Thanks for your sit. Name: Susan Braswell Email: sbraswell@tallassee.rms.slb.com Date: Thursday April 13, 2000 13:25:51 GMT Comments: This is a great site. It made me cry and think of myself, I always thought i was crazy now i know what made me feel like i did, I have always looked in a little girls eyes and know young ladies thinking are you mine.I am in search of my daughter born 2/09/69 at George Washington hospital in D.C. i stayed at the Florence Crittendon home in D.C. I named her Melissa Ann Wiggins and she was adopted in ST. Marys county maryland. Name: carol watt Email: Date: Tuesday April 04, 2000 02:05:49 GMT Comments: looking for my son adoptived bye brenda
issac pedigo in Name: kathryn Email: Date: Saturday April 01, 2000 16:00:33 GMT Comments: looking for daughter born feb.7
in jacksonville florida Email: Date: Friday March 31, 2000 19:07:58 GMT Comments: Hi Judy, Name: Kay Bogart Email: Date: Thursday March 02, 2000 19:10:17 GMT Comments: I relinquished my daughter in 1967. Thank you for recognizing and expressing the impact that single incident has always had on my life. Name: asearchershaven > http://home.infospace.com/ash15 Email: Date: Sunday February 27, 2000 23:49:19 GMT Comments: a sea full of thank you and tears
Name: Linda Gould Email: Date: Sunday February 20, 2000 10:15:53 GMT Comments: Judy, Name: Kevin Marie Shaughnessy Email: Date: Tuesday February 15, 2000 00:05:57 GMT Comments: Wonderful study, Judy. It brought back many sad and difficult memories. My daughter and I have reunited and I am finally a whole person. I spent 26 years of living hell without her. No one understands unless they have been through this. Relinquishing my daughter almost destroyed me as a person. I am going to answer your survey. It is healing to get these feelings out in the open. Name: Linda Marshall Email: Date: Tuesday February 08, 2000 01:24:28 GMT Comments: THank-you Judy for helping me
come out of the darkness so I may complete this with my son. Name: Deb Howbert Email: Date: Monday January 24, 2000 00:33:57 GMT Comments: I am happy to say I found my
daughter, born 11/14/67 Name: Radell Weisen Email: Date: Sunday January 23, 2000 02:54:44 GMT Comments: I'm a reunited birthmother who spent 43 years in grief for my son, but now I'm joyful and we're making up for our lost time. He was born/relinquished in 1956, reunited 1999. Name: Sharyl Brannon Email: Date: Tuesday January 18, 2000 02:21:49 GMT Comments: I read your thesis several months ago and have returned to read it again. I sobbed through several sections of it feeling the pain that I had buried so deep for so long. I relinquished my daughter on 6/6/70. I held her in my arms for the first time on 6/10/98. I agree with the many others that this thesis should be read by anyone counseling birth mothers. They truly have no idea what a trauma this experience was for us. And I have to admit that until I met my daughter I didn't realize what a trauma the experience was for me. The emotions were like the lava erupting from a volcano after my daughter was found. It was so comforting reading your thesis and realizing that I was not crazy after all. I hope that more studies are done on this subject as birth moms are reuniting at a record rate right now and we need this kind of information to help in the healing process. Peace and blessings to you. Name: val jean james sawyer Email: Date: Sunday January 16, 2000 04:10:55 GMT Comments: I have a daughter and a son out
there somewhere.They were taken from me in1980 Name: Janet Buffington Email: Date: Tuesday December 14, 1999 18:40:24 GMT Comments: I came across your site while looking for info for a friend and time stood still for me. I am now feeling the same pain that I had buried for years with drug and alcohol abuse. (Been clean 19 years). Knowing what is causing the pain does NOTHING to make it any less. I haven't reunited with my daughter, maybe I never will, but our info is available on the Net if she decides to look. Did you survey me without my knowledge? It was SO eerie seeing myself in that survey. Thank you so much for this opportunity to speak about my pain. I feel as though I was tricked out of my child because I was young and naive and had nowhere to go. Florence Crittendon in Wilmington, Delaware had a hell of a racket going there as I imagine all the other unwed mothers' homes did, too. God bless you. Name: Andrean Email: Date: Thursday December 09, 1999 12:37:55 GMT Comments: Thank you for posting the results. As a birthmother who is searching (daughter's birth 02/04/71), I see myself in your findings and that my emotional framework is not "crazy." Every symptom I experienced from relinquishing my infant daughter is normal! Society and greed seduced me in to giving up my child, then shoved me out of the way. A hug and then a punch in the nose. I was expected to destroy my soul to fulfill the dreams of others. We were chattel, vessels, production entities. I did put my soul back together with the guidance of an excellant therapist who did some quasi-PTSS work with me and who, when I lamented never having a family, reminded me that I have a daughter. Today I look forward with great joy to meeting her again. Name: Michelle Westbrook Email: Date: Tuesday November 23, 1999 15:49:45 GMT Comments: thank you for posting your informative survey results. This is the first site I have visited concerning these issues. I had no idea that there were other women out there who felt the things I do. You presented this information in a way which was neither insultingly sweet nor harshly detached. I think uts great. Name: Vicki Unger Email: Date: Tuesday October 26, 1999 23:25:48 GMT Comments: I think you have done an absoulty beautiful thesis of birthmothers and I want to say "THANK YOU" for telling our views and your story Name: Mara Drew Email: Date: Wednesday October 20, 1999 04:23:42 GMT Comments: Hi Judy! I am excited about your site
and am sending it to everyone I know. Name: Jamie Clark Email: Date: Wednesday October 20, 1999 00:40:41 GMT Comments: I am writing a paper for college
and this site on the internet Name: Jean Tierney Email: Date: Sunday October 17, 1999 01:42:58 GMT Comments: What a massive undertaking! I have just printed all of it thanks to a sunflower. I can't wait to read it all! My son was born 12-16-64 but I'm sure I fit in with all those bmoms from 1965 to 1972! Thank you so much for sharing this. Name: Ilona Brown Email: Date: Saturday October 16, 1999 16:53:02 GMT Comments: wow ! did I write this? I am a birthmom of 2 sons . 1962and 1964. I am newly reunited with eldest son ,so far only by email and phone . I took care of him the 5 days i was in the hospital and we bonded . my 2nd. son I only saw at birth and then was taken from the maternity floor.but i am still incomplete. Beautifully done. thanks Name: Mary Lou Smith Email: Date: Saturday October 16, 1999 03:06:48 GMT Comments: Thank you for that wonderful paper. It validated my life. Name: Penne Email: Date: Wednesday October 06, 1999 20:16:27 GMT Comments: Thank you Judy for doing this work. I've worked with so many therapists who have no idea about the impact relinquishment made on my life. In fact, it was not until my daughter found me, that I did begin to break through the barriers to experience my profound grief and loss. Penne Name: jeneugene Email: Date: Thursday September 30, 1999 15:13:44 GMT Comments: Hi Judy! I finally came to
see--it's wonderful. Name: Theresa Ann Email: Date: Sunday September 19, 1999 09:10:22 GMT Comments: Dear, dear Judy, Name: Linda Korrow Email: Date: Friday September 10, 1999 03:08:54 GMT Comments: Hi Judy, this is terrific, thanks
for the url! Name: Bessie Bearden Email: Date: Friday September 10, 1999 01:43:46 GMT Comments: What a lovely job so many birth mothers need this.I didn't relinquish a child but i have been searching for my nephew for 3yrs.Today is his birthday,he is 37yrs old.I feel a void even though he isn't my son.And a deep sadness wrapes itself around my heart. My sis was only a child. she had no control over what was being done to her.Or over the fact that her son was torn away from her.How many sad stories are there out there?? They are endless< God only can bring our children home. Name: Laura E. Berry (DiNardi) Email: Date: Tuesday September 07, 1999 09:24:17 GMT Comments: Stunning, every word so true. Only a birthmother could understand the feelings here. I relinquished in 1970 and found my daughter in 1997. Every member of the triad should read this. Name: Karen MacKay Email: Date: Monday September 06, 1999 13:49:17 GMT Comments: My daughter was born in February 1965 and we are so close to being reunited that after 34 years I am finally at peace. It's been a long, long journey. Your thesis shall be shared with all my family in order that they may understand me and what has driven me all my life. Thank you so very, very much. Name: Lori Carangelo Email: Date: Sunday August 22, 1999 08:31:26 GMT Comments: Thank you for your fine research.
I'm a birthmom, reunited with son Tom since 1987. Name: Karin Johnson Email: Date: Friday August 06, 1999 17:39:05 GMT Comments: I am a birth mother who has married the birth father, we now have three children, ages 14, 11 and 9. I would like to see information and research on the impact of subsequent children kept. Mine have gone through some "stuff" after learning of their older relinquished brother. What impact does this have on adoptees too? Name: Cathy Email: Date: Tuesday August 03, 1999 04:34:32 GMT Comments: F/adoptee Iso birthmom/family
born Easton,MD in Easton Mem. Name: Patty Steinberger Email: Date: Thursday July 15, 1999 02:49:10 GMT Comments: I had a baby girl 03/15/92 in Phoenix, AZ at the St. Joseph's hosp. on McDowell Rd. Because this child will be 18 years old soon, I am trying to leave a trail easily traced incase she tries to locate her birth parents. Name: Heather Lowe Email: Date: Tuesday June 15, 1999 17:45:44 GMT Comments: Thank you for making your thesis
available on the web. It's such Name: jacke Email: Date: Saturday June 12, 1999 17:38:03 GMT Comments: i think if someone really wants to help children, they should 'adopt' the young mother AND her baby and put them on the road to a successful life TOGETHER. early childhood devel, counseling for the young mother, job skills in an area of interest and aptitude to promote single parenting. Name: Marilyn Grubb Email: Date: Saturday June 05, 1999 20:35:45 GMT Comments: Perfect! Name: s.h.nebel Email: Date: Friday May 21, 1999 01:00:14 GMT Comments: Dear Judy, have been reading your
survey and think it's wonderful. However, all of your comments are from
b/mothers from homes with parents. I happen to be from a
"dysfunctional" home I spent several years in foster care, Name: Gretchen Long Email: Date: Tuesday May 18, 1999 14:23:19 GMT Comments: Judy thank you so much for your
hard work, your commitment, and this thesis. You have expressed the birthmom
sentiment eloquently. I am proud to have contributed a small piece towards
your research. You have made great strides in educating people to the
terrible pain so many of us have suffered. Thank you... thank you. Name: kimberly vallade (kinkle) Email: Date: Friday May 14, 1999 14:57:29 GMT Comments: my brother was given up for adoption around 1973 0r 74 because of birth defects that my parents could no longer care for he was 4 and i was 5 at the time my life long dream is to find the brother i once played and fought with he would now be 30 and hope he still calls himself Little Gary Name: Christine Dato Email: Date: Thursday May 06, 1999 22:57:20 GMT Comments: Judy, Name: Carmen Arjona Email: Date: Thursday May 06, 1999 18:37:33 GMT Comments: Judy, I don't know what it's like
for a birthmother to relinquish her child. I can only imagine the pain and it
doesn't even come close to the reality it must be. Name: Susan O'Brien Rodgers, MA ( Goddard '95) Email: Date: Tuesday May 04, 1999 17:53:42 GMT Comments: As an adoptee & author of
'Mending Fences; Burning Bridges" alos the story of relinquishment &
birthmothers my Master's thesis, I can't wait to sit down with your
project...I wish you peace & recovery. Would love to stay in touch! Name: Dianne Vock Email: Date: Tuesday May 04, 1999 03:36:08 GMT Comments: Dear Judy: Your work will impact and inspire everyone who reads it...(perhaps even the muses)! I was particularly moved by your own personal story in the postscript and by the responses of others in the guest book. By sharing this study with the world...the experiences, the pain, you have opened the door for other birthmothers to heal. Your courage and compassion are exceptional... qualities which accompany your brilliance, wisdom and unselfish quest for the betterment of all of humanity. I am deeply grateful to be your friend. My love always, Dianne Name: Kathy Lewis Email: Date: Monday May 03, 1999 23:24:59 GMT Comments: Hi Judy; Name: Gail Karcher Email: Date: Monday May 03, 1999 19:10:09 GMT Comments: Looking forward to reading your
thesis..I am VERY thankful that someone has finally done this for a project.
It is important for birthmothers to realize they are not alone. Name: Elisa M. Barton Email: mailto:ElisaMB@aol.com%20or%20Menocal@aol.com Date: Friday April 30, 1999 16:59:30 GMT Comments: Judy, unfortunately, my stupid server was not able to open up most of your writing. I would love to read it. Elisa M. Barton CONFESSIONS OF A LOST MOTHER by ElisaMB@aol.com Available at Barnes & Noble Bookstores; through Tapestry Books 1-800-765-2367; Amazon.com http://www.silcom.com/~manatee/barton_lost.html Name: Jean Dulong Email: Date: Friday April 30, 1999 14:48:57 GMT Comments: This is a VERY important piece of work. I think all counselors who work with affected birthmothers should read it. I would also like to see a study of the effect of relinquishment on the maternal birth grandmother. Name: Pam Powless Email: Date: Thursday April 29, 1999 19:38:54 GMT Comments: Thank you so much for validating
the experiences of so many of us! I am a birthmother who relinquished in
1967, and searched and found. Your work should be required reading for all
therapists and social workers! Name: Rosie Haught Email: Date: Thursday April 29, 1999 15:39:59 GMT Comments: I cried the whole time I read your postscript. I remembered my feeligs. Feelings that I am remembering more and more. I have memories now, that I did not have for so many years. Your thoughts, words, research, should be made available to all who need to be educated about this. Thank you! Name: Linda Email: Date: Wednesday April 28, 1999 21:35:12 GMT Comments: I'm a birthmom of 1968. I received no information on how to keep my child, even though I repeatedly begged to be allowed to keep him. I received no options. I also did not get any requests for his placement. Those that I asked for were ignored. I never received any help adjusting to the relinquishment nor the effects that this extremely traumatic experience would have on my life and that of my subsequent family. I feel the same pain today as I did over 31 years ago. In fact, after finding my son, it intesified. I have suffered severe depression over the years. I was never allowed to mention *IT*. Looking back I find that I am angry at my parents, at the social workers and at the doctors who insisted I give away my own flesh and blood. I may never get over this anger..in fact I know I won't. Name: Teri Mennie Email: Date: Wednesday April 28, 1999 17:46:09 GMT Comments: Well done, I relinquesed in 64 and most of this still applies to me. Unnessecary adoption, forced by my mother. Name: Beth Culler Email: Date: Wednesday April 28, 1999 00:24:22 GMT Comments: Dear Judy, I am really moved by how much your work has touched others. It has been an honor to be your advisor through this process. Beth Name: Kathleen Shipley Email: Date: Wednesday April 28, 1999 00:15:15 GMT Comments: I am very proud to have been a part of this research - You have validated what I have tried to tell my family and friends about the experience. I have bookmarked this page and will come back often. Thank you so much for doing this !!!!! Name: Kay Email: Date: Tuesday April 27, 1999 05:15:32 GMT Comments: I almost forgot. Please visit my
adoption web site at: Name: Kay Email: Date: Tuesday April 27, 1999 05:12:20 GMT Comments: I've only just scanned it. It sounds wonderful -- to be heard finally. I just saw my therapist today, and she said that I helped her understand adoption from a mother's point of view. She now has 3 more mothers traumatized by adoption in therapy, and she says that working with me has helped her work with them better. It's extremely important that society learn what adoption does to the mothers of children lost to adoption! Thank you so much Judy. Name: Judi Batchelor Email: Date: Monday April 26, 1999 14:33:12 GMT Comments: If I had only known that what I
was experiencing after surrendering was not abnormal then I might not have thought
I was crazy for 29 years. At least I'm not going to die without knowing the
sound of my son's voice or what he looked like. This little bit gives me some
degree of peace, but it was not enough. I wish all my sister birthmothers
this peace. Name: Lila Swords Email: Date: Sunday April 25, 1999 22:13:04 GMT Comments: I love the site and was very interested in the results of the survey. Name: Rosalind Maya Lama Email: Date: Sunday April 25, 1999 21:47:44 GMT Comments: Judy, Name: Carol Kisnics Email: Date: Sunday April 25, 1999 21:14:02 GMT Comments: Your site is very educational and
well put together. I also Name: Joy Larkin Pantelis Email: Date: Sunday April 25, 1999 21:08:29 GMT Comments: Thank you for allowing me to
participate in your birthmother study. I have printed your paper so I can
have a hardcopy to read/reread/share. Name: Beth Houlihan Email: Date: Sunday April 25, 1999 20:06:36 GMT Comments: Dear Judy, Name: ELAINE MUNRO Email: Date: Sunday April 25, 1999 19:28:03 GMT Comments: I to am a birthmom still looking
for my son who will Name: Barbara Faith Cuyler Email: Date: Sunday April 25, 1999 16:43:38 GMT Comments: Very good. I am a birth mother who gave up her baby girl in 1966. I have been searching for her for years. I am tormented by the fact that she's not with me. I was forced to give her up. Not a day goes by that I don't think of her. Your work on this subject was most interesting. It was very good! Name: Bonnie Email: Date: Sunday April 25, 1999 16:24:48 GMT Comments: I am an adoptee searching for bfamily. I am just starting to realize what all of the bmoms went through. Thanks for doing the survey...it is very informative. Bonnie Proud Canadopt member #1269 Name: theresa, list-owner of floridatriad@onelist.com Email: Date: Sunday April 25, 1999 13:53:34 GMT Comments: I THINK THIS WS VERY GOOD, YOU ASKED GREAT QUESTIONS, MAYBE IT WILL HELP OTHERS.. Name: Lia Rodriguez Email: Date: Sunday April 25, 1999 13:45:15 GMT Comments: It is a fascinating study and piece to write about. I have seen so little on the subject of birthmothers relinquishing their babies and its affects on our lives. What can it be used for? How many professional people will look at it? I now see there is much more of us out there than I could ever imagine and for a long time I thought I was one in a million this happened to. I hope someday I will see changes that will benefit birthmothers that find themselves in this situation although times have changed since. If only we had more choices back then...... Name: Suzanne Burns Email: Date: Sunday April 25, 1999 10:50:38 GMT Comments: I as ,a B-mom (member of the
Sunflowers) have taken part in this Name: Susan Email: Date: Sunday April 25, 1999 02:30:18 GMT Comments: Fabulous paper. I am a reunited bmom. My daughter was born on 6/2/72 and back in my arms 12/28/96. My life has begun to heal again.... Name: Peggy Email: Date: Sunday April 25, 1999 01:54:36 GMT Comments: I participated in your study. My
son was born in 1965.. Name: Jean M . Olsommer Email: Date: Sunday April 25, 1999 01:21:20 GMT Comments: I one of the moms in the story. I
have given up my daughter Name: vivien ann nicoll Email: Date: Sunday April 25, 1999 00:33:41 GMT Comments: It was very helpful. Name: Vicki Miller aka Vicki M Email: Date: Sunday April 25, 1999 00:27:17 GMT Comments: Dear Judy , Your work is wonderful. Is there away I could get a copy of this. I would pay for it and the postage. Vicki M Name: Norma Samsel Email: Date: Saturday April 24, 1999 22:38:40 GMT Comments: Judy ... I found your writing mesmerizing. I wanted to be a part of your survey, but my relinquishment occurred in 1962. Your thesis should be required reading for all persons who offer counseling to birthmothers. We have been "in the shadows" way too long. I have been reunited with my birthson since 1983...Only another birthmother KNOWS the trauma, anguish and pain that we have all endured! Thanks for making this available on your webpage. Name: Emma Jane Crowley Email: Date: Saturday April 24, 1999 21:04:43 GMT Comments: I find this information on your
thesis very true. Name: Terri Leber Email: Date: Saturday April 24, 1999 20:11:40 GMT Comments: Judy thank you for the great work
you have done and for sharing it with the world. We will all continue to work
hard to make sure the true story of what happened to birthmothers is told by
birthmothers. Your great thesis goes a long way towards dispelling the myths
perpetuated by the likes of the NCFA and agencies. Name: Victoria Lawson Email: Date: Saturday April 24, 1999 19:52:15 GMT Comments: Judy, I read every word -
absolutely amazing. Name: Pamela K Roberts (Sarai M.Kendall) Email: Date: Saturday April 24, 1999 19:38:13 GMT Comments: I wish --that more people like you could get involved that truely understand our pain. For me --I don't know if it will ever end ,even if I find. Thank -you for a true portrait of birthmothers Name: Pamela Weber-Hamlin Email: Date: Saturday April 24, 1999 19:04:29 GMT Comments: Happy to have been part of this excellent work! |